In Episode 58 of the Wealth On Any Income Podcast, Rennie is joined by Chris Gomberg. Chris is a California licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and Certified Professional Retirement Coach (CPRC). He has been in the work/life and employee assistance program field for nearly 40 years and is the former director of EAP services at Cedars-Sinai hospital. Today he now continues to provide EAP services at 3M and has been providing private pre-retirement and retirement coaching for more than 10 years.
In Episode 58 of the Wealth On Any Income Podcast, Rennie is joined by Chris Gomberg. Chris is a California licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and Certified Professional Retirement Coach (CPRC). He has been in the work/life and employee assistance program field for nearly 40 years and is the former director of EAP services at Cedars-Sinai hospital. Today he now continues to provide EAP services at 3M and has been providing private pre-retirement and retirement coaching for more than 10 years.
Rennie and Chris have known each other for over 25 years!
In this episode Rennie and Chris cover:
About Chris
Chris Gomberg is a California licensed marriage and family therapist (LMFT) and Certified Professional Retirement Coach (CPRC). Chris obtained his master’s in education/counseling and Bachelor of Arts from the University of Vermont and has been in the work/life, employee assistance program (EAP) field for nearly 40 years.
As an EAP Counselor, Chris has worked with thousands of employees and their family members when they have sought professional help for work, family or personal concerns. Several years ago, Chris turned his attention to developing a coaching program to help employees with concerns about their retirement transition.
In the process of developing the pre-retirement coaching program, Chris realized he had a real passion for coaching and assisting people who wanted to enhance their retirement planning. With a focus the physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being, Chris is helping pre-retirement and retirement clients manage their next chapter of their life. It is, after all, more than just about the money!
Chris has presented at local and national conferences as well as many workshops on such topics as Personal and Work Change Management, Balancing a Personal and Professional Life, Positive Psychology, Stress Management and Building Resiliency, and Retirement Transition.
Chris has provided Employee Assistance Program (EAP) consulting services for several Fortune 500 companies including 3M, Mattel, and Health Net and worked at Cedars-Sinai’s Work and Life Matters/EAP both as director of the EAP and as a Work/Life Specialist, providing direct client services. Chris is certified in Critical Incident Stress Management and is licensed by the Institute of HeartMath® as a Coach and Certified Trainer in stress reduction.
Reach out to Chris today to get a copy of his five year planning sheet at https://chrisgombergretirementcoach.com/
If you'd like to know how books, movies, and society programs you to be poor, and what the cure is visit wealthonanyincome.com/tedx. You'll hear Rennie's TEDx talk and can request a free 27-page Roadmap to Complete Financial Choice™ and receive a weekly email with tips, techniques, or inspiration around your business or money.
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Rennie Gabriel 00:09
Hi, folks, welcome to Episode 58 of the Wealth On Any Income podcast. This is where we talk about money tips, techniques, attitudes, information, and provide inspiration. I'm your host Rennie Gabriel. In past episodes, we spoke about how to build an income and expense report, how to measure the level of pleasure based on where you spend your money, how to track your money in 5 - 10 seconds, what to look for in a net worth statement to see how close you are to Complete Financial Choice™. And last week, we had Bernadette Donnelly, who is a life coach for professionals who want more from their careers and their life. Today, we have as our guest, Chris Gomberg. I've known Chris for over 25 years. He is a California Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, and a Certified Professional retirement coach. He's been in the work-life employee assistance program field for nearly 40 years. And he's a former director of EAP services at Cedars Sinai Hospital. After he retired, he now continues to provide EAP services at 3M and has been providing retirement coaching for more than 10 years. Welcome to the show, Chris.
Chris Gomberg 01:28
Is that what we're doing today? I thought we're going to lunch?
Rennie Gabriel 01:30
Yeah, we're actually broadcasting - oh excuse me - recording this thing to broadcast later.
Chris Gomberg 01:35
Okay, well, thank you for the welcome. I'm really glad to be here.
Rennie Gabriel 01:38
So, Chris, got a good idea of what you do. But why do you do it?
Chris Gomberg 01:45
Good question, Rennie. You know, I've come to find out over that 10 years that more than 10,000 people a day are retiring. And many of them have focused on just the financial side of their retirement. Are they going to have enough money in retirement? Are they're going to live long enough to enjoy their retirement? But there's a bigger picture on this, Rennie. It goes beyond the financial security. It's kind of what some people call that "dark side" of retirement. And that's the physical, mental, emotional, spiritual side of retirement. The bottom line is you can be financially set, but still be struggling with your day-to-day activities, like being bored, and searching to find a new identity. And missing all those social connections you used to have in the workplace, managing family issues, your health and well-being. And so you're going to be challenged by one of life's most significant events - and that's retirement.
Rennie Gabriel 02:38
It's so true, what you're saying, because I've personally experienced it. I could have stopped working eight years ago, but I wouldn't have known what to do anyhow. So you know, now I work by choice, and I donate 100% of the profits from my work to charity. Is there a particular charity that you support? And if so, what do they do?
Chris Gomberg 03:02
Several, and some of them are going to be close to your heart because they have to do with animals. And you know, your Shelter to Soldier™ program. So among the things we do is the Paws for Purple Hearts, the Guide Dogs for the Blind, spcaLA, the one in Los Angeles, The Humane Society. So we've had our dogs, and we just want to take care of those pooches as well. But we're also committed to the notion of helping people with food insecurity. You know, as the largest country with the greatest resources, the idea that there are people going to sleep at night not knowing where their next meal is coming from. So we're involved with LA Food Bank, and then locally with the family Rescue Center here in the West Valley. And then of course, we support public broadcasting the local television station. So a few things.
Rennie Gabriel 03:55
Yeah. Thank you, Chris. Thank you, for all the contributions you make. And when it comes to the people that you're working with, are they young people? Who are your target market? And by the way, we're talking about retirement planning. And I don't like to use the word "retirement" because most people think of that as they've stopped work. And now, you know, maybe they've got a picture in their head that they're going to watch daytime TV with a torn t-shirt and a can of beer in their hands.
Chris Gomberg 04:26
Right.
Rennie Gabriel 04:26
I have . . . one of the people that I'm connected to - talks about how the word "retire" is used on the farm, which is where she grew up. And when a cow is no longer productive, they put it out to pasture so that it can die. And that's called retiring the cow.
Chris Gomberg 04:46
Uh huh.
Rennie Gabriel 04:47
So I don't like to apply that kind of thinking to people. 'Oh, now that you've completed your career, you can go out and just sit around until you die'. So tell me who your target clients are.
Chris Gomberg 05:01
Yeah, I hear what you're saying, Rennie. There are some old myths about retirement. And that basically you're going to sit on the porch, rocking, maybe pulling your - now portable - TV out there and drink your beer and wait for your ticket to be called. And the old days of that kind of stuff, that's pretty much what people did - just going to wait to die. And I think the advances in health care, and social interaction and physical well-being, all of those things are extending people's lives. So they are in fact going to live 20, 30, 40 years into retirement. And how are they going to make that meaningful and productive?
Rennie Gabriel 05:44
And that's why, that's why I like to use the term Complete Financial Choice™. So you choose to work continually, or you choose not to work or you choose to travel. Or you choose to donate your time to charity. The point is, you have Complete Financial Choice™.
Chris Gomberg 06:01
Yes.
Rennie Gabriel 06:02
And that's the point as opposed to retirement. But you know. So your target market are? Go ahead.
Chris Gomberg 06:08
Okay. So the target market that I initially was, well, those people who were five years out from when they're going to start drawing Social Security. So, I was thinking, well, 57. And it's like, you know, you look at some of the recent stuff, where people are really considering retiring much earlier than that, like maybe in their 50s, or they have been entrepreneurs in an area, and they have that kind of wealth, that they don't need to go to their 8-5, 8-9 kind of job. And so, but they want to see what they're doing with their life, rather than just being in that rocker on the porch. So I would say, you know, certainly people in their 50s, much younger than that, really. I see people working with folks like you to prepare all the financial stuff in advance, so that they can make those choices. They can have that wealth accumulating. They can make those kinds of plans, but then starting in their 50s, they start that transition into the next stage. And that's where people have said, second chapter, next stage. We'll have to come up with some word for that. But retirement just brings that image of Bessie the cow, and that's just not going to work for us. Right? Certainly not for you and me.
Rennie Gabriel 07:20
Right. And yeah, I already know that. And yeah, for you and me, that's not going to work.
Chris Gomberg 07:26
And I just add, you know, that includes both the pre-retirement but also "in retirement" folks, the folks who've been caught off guard by the, you know, twiddling my thumbs, and that rocker is just not comfortable. I want to do something more. So "in retirement" folks are part of my group as well.
Rennie Gabriel 07:45
That makes a lot of sense. Yeah. Because after a year or two of not knowing what the heck's going on, they still need someone to talk to.
Chris Gomberg 07:52
And I think that's a normal part of the process is, maybe six months to two years - the Hartford has this really fun graphic, I can share with people at some point - around, you know, relax, revitalize, regenerate, revive yourself from the challenges of working that full-time plus job, and then starting to explore what are the opportunities in terms of volunteerism, part time, full time work? There's no reason for people not to go into full retirement, if that's what they want to do. I know a guy that bought one of those huge Winnebagos that are tough to turn around on a corner. And no one's heard from him since, but I know he's traveling all throughout the United States in full retirement. So it's not like you have to have pursuits.
Rennie Gabriel 08:38
Yeah, well I mean, his travel covering the United States could be considered the pursuit.
Chris Gomberg 08:44
Yeah. In that respect, though, people need to do the things that will keep them sharp.
Rennie Gabriel 08:49
Yeah.
Chris Gomberg 08:49
So you look at people like Sanjay Gupta, who has that book, Keeping Sharp, about if we want to live the healthy part of our life and stay well, you got to stay stimulated, got to stay engaged. And that's part of what the coaching can involve. It's not just sitting on a rock. We're going to pound that one under the ground, aren't we?
Rennie Gabriel 08:49
So I'm going to assume there's typical feelings your prospects experience. What would you say it is?
Chris Gomberg 09:17
I would say, it starts with uncertainty. That they're like, 'Okay, I know, I want to sleep in. I know, I want to slow the pace down. But I'm not quite sure what I'm going to do after that.' And so it results sometimes in people not talking about that anxiety and that fear, and they isolate. And so they do that in pre-retirement, and then they do it after retirement. And they'll get a lot of advice from their financial advisor and their portfolio manager, but they don't get enough support for that emotional, social, physical, spiritual side of that to say, how am I going to integrate my activities, into how I'm going to spend my money? And not addressing those things can end up in some pretty serious mental health issues around substance abuse, depression and anxiety, isolation, social and family issues. So, you know that's what I see in either the pre-retirement - how am I going to do this? Or the people in retirement, who like one guy looked at me one day said, "I'm so bored". And it just wasn't good for him, as he had not done that other part of his retirement planning.
Rennie Gabriel 10:30
Well, that makes perfect sense from the standpoint that I would say what you've just spoken about are common mistakes your prospects make from the standpoint of isolation, not looking at the whole picture, not anticipating, you know, what the spiritual, emotional side could be?
Chris Gomberg 10:48
Yeah.
Rennie Gabriel 10:48
Give me an example, other than the person who just said, "I'm bored", of what someone came to you with, what you spoke about, and what the result turned out to be?
Chris Gomberg 11:00
Well, let me, for client confidentiality as a licensed mental health professional, I have to protect people's privacy. So I'll kind of put them into a conglomerate...
Rennie Gabriel 11:10
Okay.
Chris Gomberg 11:10
of experiences. But certainly one of them could be, I'm going to retire in about two weeks. I have 14 grandkids. I think my kids think I'm going to be the "on call" babysitter for 14 kids.
Rennie Gabriel 11:26
Was this a man or a woman?
Chris Gomberg 11:27
Woman. And she wanted to go to breakfast with her partner every day, and not be on call. And there was just some real major anxiety. So we developed a script for her to let her kids know, I'm not going to retire and become the full time babysitter, because with 14 grandkids, that could be 7 days a week.
Rennie Gabriel 11:53
Oh, yeah, you're talking about opening up a childcare facility.
Chris Gomberg 11:57
Truly, truly. So that was that was an example of somebody. Another person, the struggle was relocation. Do they stay in town? Do they move somewhere else in California? Or do they move out of state. And as we kind of develop the criteria, we got to that point where the partner was, quite ill - had chronic illness- and would need to be, if they were going to relocate, near a health care center with the expertise to help that person with their problems. So, you know, it's everything from how am I going to address family issues, to healthcare issues... So yeah, those are the typical kinds of client issues that just sometimes take some direct problem-solving.
Rennie Gabriel 12:42
That makes sense. Yeah, there's so much to think about. Well, I'm, you know, we can't solve it all in a 15-minute interview. So tell me if there's some resource, some valuable resource that you can direct people to that will, you know, continue to support them?
Chris Gomberg 12:59
Yeah. So I do have a five-year planning sheet that I'd be happy to send out to people if they connect with my website, chrisgombergretirementcoach.com, and I'll send it to them. It's basically the idea that, you know, when we're developing our adult career, we're looking at, you know, from 20 - 60. And we're talking with people about what we want to do, we're strategizing, we're developing processes, we're wanting to advance in what we're doing, make meaningful contributions, and so on. And then suddenly, when you retire, it's like, 'Well, I'm going to stop all that stuff.' You already have the skills and abilities. Now, utilize them. And so this planning sheet is a great way to develop that. It's five years, so you kind of go in two ways. You look at where do I want to be in five years, and how do I want to do this in the next quarter? And I'm sure financial planners use this approach as well. But you know, it's systemic. A lot of family therapists use that systems model around, it's not just about your financial plan, what's your work plan, what's your family plan, what's your health plan? All of those kinds of things that changing one is going to impact the other. So that planning sheet is a very effective way. And you know, I said it's going to be 20 - 40 years of retirement, but let's at least start with the first five, and then we can expand it. And I did have a client I shared that with and she came back with five different iterations. Because, in one case, it was about moving out of town. And another case it was staying in town. What did it mean about staying in the current home? What kind of renovations? You know, and then their own health issues around wanting to continue in exercise and so on. So systemically, changing one will bring about a change on the others and that's what the plan is.
Rennie Gabriel 13:23
And it sounds like that we're talking about a holistic approach and not a narrow-defined niche. So . . . terrific.
Chris Gomberg 15:01
I like that word holistic. It is.
Rennie Gabriel 15:04
Thank you.
Chris Gomberg 15:04
As therapists talk about systemic family systems theory, you called it right. It's holistic.
Rennie Gabriel 15:11
Is there a question that I should have asked you, that I didn't ask?
Chris Gomberg 15:15
Yeah. So what's my retirement going to look like? You didn't ask me that. And I think like you, I'm just not emotionally fit to retire. I get nervous around cows and pasture. So I think what, you know, when I look at kind of where I'm headed next, I don't see myself capable of just sitting back and not being connected with people, not being able to make contributions not help supporting people in their journey. So I see doing this retirement coaching for quite some time. I think that's a direction to head in for me. I really enjoy doing my employee assistance program work. So I'll continue to do that, kind of keeps me engaged in my profession. So I could see kind of needing to make those contributions and sustaining that for quite some time.
Rennie Gabriel 16:07
Thank you, Chris. And I think most of the listeners that I have, would be in similar situations, so this is a perfect fit for them. And I want to thank you for being on the show.
Chris Gomberg 16:20
Well, thank you. I was enjoying you as always.
Rennie Gabriel 16:22
Thank you. And to my listeners, thank you for tuning in. You can listen to the Wealth On Any Income podcast on your favorite platform. And please rate, review and subscribe. And if you'd like to know how books, movies and society programs you to be poor, and what the cure is, then log on to wealthonanyincome.com/TEDx. I'll also have Chris's website address in the show notes so that you can connect with that planning sheet. And also, if you connect on my website, you'll hear my TEDx talk, and can request a free 27-page roadmap to Complete Financial Choice™ and receive a weekly email with tips, techniques or inspiration around your business or money. Again, that's, wealthonanyincome.com/TEDx. Next week, our guest will be Tom Bailey. He spent 25 years avoiding public speaking and then learned how to master it and help others to do the same. Until next week, be prosperous. Bye bye for now.